Just scroll down and let your tummy pain of these hilarious jokes.
1.
X = hug
XX = two hugs
XXX = porn#thatescalatedquickly— Shruti (@ShrutiSeTakkar) June 26, 2014
2.
He :Talk dirty to me.
Me : Baarish se kichad kichad ho jata hai sab.— nin (@NautankiNinja) May 4, 2014
3.
When he finally finds your g-spot pic.twitter.com/jgFRLyAW7q
— Priyal (@priyal) October 7, 2015
4.
Hottest scene in a Rajshri productions movie pic.twitter.com/916TtfVsbp
— Cathartic Screams (@Just_Screams) January 31, 2016
5.
(late 20s & living w parents)
me: mom we r out of eggs so i am going out to buy some
mom: soon u will b out of eggs that cannot be bought
— crapo (@Creepowoman) December 24, 2016
6.
i call my vagina ‘pomegranate’ because dudes don’t know how to eat it
— priya (@priya_ebooks) July 5, 2014
7.
Mood: Emran Hashmi
Relationship status: Salman Khan— nin (@NautankiNinja) August 29, 2015
8.
#PahlajNihalani is definitely the guy who prematurely ejaculates. There is no other reason to be upset by long kisses.
— radhika vaz (@radvaz) November 21, 2015
9.
Hey boy are you a good at excel coz I want to spread the sheet for you
— mediocre gandhi (@mediocregandhi) June 29, 2015
10.
One night stand? Matlab puri raat khada rehna padta hai?
— Parpalwa (@MePurplelicious) February 11, 2015
11.
Bangover: The morning after really great sex
— Madhura (@PunsTurnMeOn) April 17, 2015
12.
Someone replace the dotted condoms by bubble wrap condoms. For boredom issues.
— Medha 🌹 (@White_Crimes) July 19, 2013
13.
I miss the way you looked into my eyes and said kajal ke bina tum bilkul bimaar dikhti ho baby.
— Parpalwa (@MePurplelicious) February 12, 2015
14.
So apparently selfies are called ‘khudkis’ in Hindi. Chalo khudki lete hain? Ergh.
— Damsel in This Dress (@secondofhername) April 11, 2014
15.
Texts like these 😍😍😍 pic.twitter.com/EVM61UWtFv
— Purva (@thatobesewoman) November 2, 2015
16.
If you have Sex on 1st Jan you become
Do Jism Ek Jan .
— nin (@NautankiNinja) January 1, 2016
17.
Oh baby make me scream harder
*burns a hole in her Zara dress*
— mediocre gandhi (@mediocregandhi) February 19, 2016
18.
“i broke my wrist”
facebook: oh my god are you okay should i send food
twitter: how will you masturbate now— a kite (@pigeonladyX) May 5, 2016
19.
Hey boy, are you Moov?
Cause you take me आह से… आहा तक.— Madhura (@PunsTurnMeOn) March 17, 2015
20.
What’s your multiple orgasm style? pic.twitter.com/fp0bnXmQdk
— Animisha (@anymysha) October 29, 2016
21.
sext: pic.twitter.com/3JXJxWmiEe
— karishma✨ (@karishhhmaa) September 11, 2016
22.
Sex is basically just two people helping each other masturbate better.
— rekt-angle👼 (@aNuSFW) October 19, 2014
23.
Told the taxi dude to jump the red light and now wondering if he’s wondering how wild I am in bed
— be nice or gtfo (@amyoosed) April 25, 2016
24.
Sup geometry pic.twitter.com/XcaZl1fUMj
— glistening (@4ngery) September 6, 2014
25.
Boy, are you Monday, because you came too soon.
— Animisha (@anymysha) November 2, 2015
26.
How can you keep your South Indian boyfriend happy?
Love, sex aur dosa
— Priyal (@priyal) November 8, 2015
27.
My biggest worry when I’m flirting with a boy is that he’s going to die & our text messages are going to be on the news.
— P (@lovehandle_) November 12, 2012
28.
Sometimes I charge my phone up to 98% and unplug it bcz why should I be the only one who didn’t have the orgasm
— be nice or gtfo (@amyoosed) November 12, 2016
29.
How do you say ‘glow-in-the-dark condoms’ in Hindi? This chemist just said “all of them work in the dark”.
— Animisha (@anymysha) October 20, 2016
30.
When you give up on dating: pic.twitter.com/JmyBrfAEzb
— Supriya (@supaarwoman) April 3, 2016
31.
Russian porn gets me soviet.
— Madhura (@PunsTurnMeOn) June 28, 2015
32.
“Neeche ishq hai
Oopar rub hai”Someone’s got it all wrong.
— WolfMomma (@wolfmomz) March 21, 2016
33.
Premature ejaculation is the reason why some people have thrust issues.
— be nice or gtfo (@amyoosed) November 11, 2014
34.
Indian women don’t have a G-spot. They have an Ae ji-spot.
— Ankita (@lady_gabbar) April 5, 2013
35.
Me talking about my crush when he isn’t looking pic.twitter.com/x2LrTWjAYw
— glistening (@4ngery) September 29, 2014
36.
Doctor: What are you using for contraception?
Me : Hope.— Shweta (@Localheroin) August 12, 2016
37.
“Deggi Mirch”
Mirch: nahi Dungi!!— Sense of tumor (@dashhtweets) February 16, 2015
38.
He: Baby, talk dirty to me 😉
Me: Abey, kachre ki aulad*BLOCKED*
— Jungli Billi (@iamhorcrux) December 24, 2014
39.
If I got laid everytime you made sense, I’d still be a virgin.
— Medha 🌹 (@White_Crimes) June 14, 2013
40.
*Going through my contact list*
Dad: Beta, yeh jo Tinder surname waale hai matlab woh kaunsi caste ke hote hai?
— Sonali Thakker (@SonaliThakker) March 26, 2016
41.
Why subtitles?
WHAAAAY? pic.twitter.com/2Sk01s08Ne
— Sharanya (@TheTinyWoman) May 27, 2016
42.
Ab haath na hilao, Meru cabs bulao?
Meru hilayegi?
— Lola Kuttiamma (@Priya_Menon) March 26, 2015
43.
So when Aladdin rubs something and gets rich it’s a fairy tale but when other girls do it it’s prostitution?
— ζ (@zedchrmsm) August 23, 2016
44.
Well, thanks @NetflixIndia pic.twitter.com/gQkP3RYH6E
— La Vie En Rose (@gsforever22) February 1, 2017
45.
Throat so sore, my vagina is jealous.
— Meh. (@MissTumbledore) October 4, 2016
46.
Bc MCQ me bhi is se zada choices hoti hai pic.twitter.com/6G3mjaEdPi
— 👯 (@lameboregini) October 17, 2016
47.
Cracking clichéd jokes to entertain myself. #tinderstories pic.twitter.com/MBuKp0kozk
— Shruti (@ShrutiSeTakkar) May 29, 2016
48.
But pens hasn’t even taken us out to dinner first! pic.twitter.com/nQ2gTMUWNS
— Purva (@thatobesewoman) October 24, 2014
49.
when you have a crush on the hottest boy in school pic.twitter.com/slps0q5JoG
— Nirali Shah (@nirali_ss) September 15, 2016
50.
What turns you on ?
Girls – Neck Kisses, Waist Grabbing, Thigh Kisses, Hickeys, Hugs, Blah Blah
Boys – Yaar main already turned on hu.
— Saverita Fernandes. (@Fernandes_Savvy) March 7, 2016
51.
Sext: I can spell Nietzsche.
— Animisha (@anymysha) October 9, 2015
